Skin and Bones

A few days ago I wrote about my journey on the low road.

Well, clearly I wasn't the only one on that road. The clearly airbrushed model in the picture, Filippa Hamilton, is actually a 5'10", 120 pound supermodel.

Whose contract with Ralph Lauren was terminated last April. According to Hamilton, Lauren terminated her because she was "too large".

Uhm...

Uhm...

I'm really trying not to use the words that are flying through my head right now. My dad wouldn't approve.

I'm 5'10" tall. According to Weight Watchers, the "healthy" weight range for that height is between 139 and 174 pounds. A normal BMI, according to the National Institutes of Health is 18.5-24.9. A 5'10" woman weighing 120 has a BMI of 17.2, which not only puts her OUT of the "normal" range, but plops her clearly in the "underweight" range.

Now, I'm not a big one for relying on numbers and charts, and frankly, "normal" is just a setting on a washing machine. But if Ralph Lauren feels that Filippa Hamilton is "large" with her 5'10", 120 pound frame, why does he even BOTHER with his Lauren Woman line of clothing for sizes 14-22? I'm sure he'd much rather be designing for those models in the size 0-2 range.

Better yet, why bother with girls like Filippa Hamilton at all. I mean, they could save loads of money and airbrush time if they went with a whole cadre of the perfect supermodels...

You take the high road and I'll take the low road...

I really try not to swear. Aside from my faith-related viewpoint, I always hear my dad's voice in my head saying that people who swear are showing their ignorance, because they can't think of appropriate words to describe their feelings.

Sorry, Dad, but there are no words in the entire English language to adequately convey my feelings for what I'm about to share with my bloggy friends.

Today I saw this photo on Robin's blog, Pensieve.



Uhm...

Uhhh...

What the F*CK?!

Now, I know all about the photoshopping insanity that goes on in the editing departments for the sole purpose of driving women insane trying to look like a supermodel eliminating any shred of positive self-esteem that young female humans have left selling the products, but honestly? Do they REALLY think that this ad will sell jeans to any human being?

I'm not even going to address the fact that I can't imagine buying jeans that look like THAT when they're new. But good grief. Someone needs to either feed that poor girl or fire the photoshopping idiot who thought that putting the waist/hips of a six year-old on an adult woman was a good idea.

If this is high fashion, then Ohmygranny, am I glad to live in the lowlands.

Where are Stacy and Clinton when you need them?

I used to be a huge fan of awards shows. Not sure why, but I really enjoyed them. Now? Notsomuch.

Maybe it's because I can count on one hand the number of movies I watched in the theatre in the last nine years. Or maybe the fact that my television maturity has been severely stunted by Nickelodeon, The Disney Channel and PBS Kids.

For some odd reason, with about forty minutes to kill last night, I turned on the Emmys. I'd missed most of the big awards, but I got the sense that, with a few exceptions, I'm apparently even more out of touch than I thought when it comes to current television.

How did I figure this out?

Well, out of the seven shows nominated for Outstanding Drama, I've seen episodes from exactly ONE of them (House). And the Outstanding Comedy is even sadder. Out of those seven? Not a blessed one. The rest of my results were pretty similar.

Out of eighteen non-technical categories, I've seen House, American Idol, Dancing With the Stars, The Closer, Law & Order: SVU, Monk, SNL and The Letterman Show.

That's it.

I felt even more out of the loop when I watched Cherry Jones win for Outstanding Supporting Actress in a Drama.

I never heard of Cherry Jones.

Not even name recognition. At least I'm pretty good with having HEARD of most of the actors.

But the one thing that never fails to entertain me is the fashion recap on the day following any major awards show.

There's always your typical "Best and Worst", and this year was no exception. But ohmygranny...one just really stood out.

Almost makes me wish I would've watched one of the pre-event shows this year just to hear the commentator's reaction.

Witness this "off the Barack" creation sported by actress Victoria Rowell...


Kind of ironic when you consider what a fashion icon Mrs. O. has become.