It's Not Whether You Win or Lose...

I'm getting old.

Lately, I'm starting more and more sentences with "When I was a kid..." or "When I was your age...". I find it happens often when discussing sports.

Now, lest you think I make a habit of discussing sports, I don't. But the value of team sports and other team co-curriculars for kids has always been, in my opinion, underestimated. Cooperation is a part of life, and the sooner one learns the importance of interdependence, the smoother things will go for them.

Competition is a part of life too, although education systems over the past couple of decades have done their best to devalue this part of life. Rather than teaching children how to win and lose gracefully while respecting the work done on both sides, schools seem more concerned with not damaging the "fragile self-esteem" of the children. While I certainly want good educators to help build my child's self-esteem, I think it's absurd to teach them that competition is bad. In any sport, any activity, any task in life, there will always be those more or less competent than you. More or less lucky than you. More or less efficient than you.

You either learn to deal with it or you don't.

Which means you either become a gracious winner AND loser or you run the risk of becoming negative, bitter or arrogant, not having learned how to do either very well at all.

Andre Dawson was a great baseball player who was recently inducted into the Baseball Hall of Fame. He learned as a child and throughout his career to be a gracious winner AND loser.

Being a professional baseball player for him wasn't as much about the notoriety, insane salaries or being on a World Series-bound team every year. It was about playing for the love of the game. It's reported that when Dawson's contract was up in Montreal, he wanted to play for one team and one team only. He sent a blank, signed contract to the manager of the Chicago Cubs. Dawson told them he didn't care what number showed up in the salary line, his blood ran Cubbie Blue.

If you follow professional baseball to any degree (or even if you don't, for that matter), you probably know that the Chicago Cubs aren't exactly known for being the winning team every year. Dawson didn't care. He knew that there was more to life than winning baseball games. He loved the sport and loved the Cubs. A living example of doing what you love and loving what you do.

Pretty good lesson, if you ask me.

My friend Stephanie is a lifelong, dyed-in-the-wool Chicago Cubs fan. She's learned a lot from Andre Dawson. You can read her thoughts here.

It's nice that in the craziness of self-esteem issues, steroid use and salary insanity, we have a few shining examples out there. Those who know that HOW you play the game determines how well you win or lose.

Love life, and it will love you back.

Picnic Guests

The Manimal is at a fun age. He's very imaginative and has a strong bond with the Fire Ants. If you're in the southern part of the USA, you know that fire ants are nasty little creatures. Diva Nana tells a story from when we lived in Mississippi and I sat in a fire ants' nest. The little beasts invaded my diaper and ohmygranny.

You can imagine what my reaction must have been. I'm just grateful that I have no memory whatsoever of the incident.

As you could probably guess, our fire ants aren't real, except in the vivid imagination of one almost four year-old.

I was a bit puzzled, though, when he started talking about them. He's never seen real fire ants and we've never discussed them.

One day, though, he solved the mystery for me. He was telling me a very elaborate story about how the fire ants got arrested.

By the police ants.

Off now to make my bread and hear more tales of the fire ants!

File this under: "I'm really glad there are only two of them"

Children are never dull. In defense of that statement, I offer the following:

On Sunday evening, after a deafening burst of quiet emanated from our upstairs bathroom, Diva Husband found The Manimal STANDING on the bathroom counter unscrewing the light bulbs.

Shortly thereafter, I went to inspect another rumble of too much quiet and found the same child sitting IN the powder room sink playing in the water trying to "wash" the willow branches that are in a vase on the counter.

Last night, in a fit of motherly frustration, I told him that if he didn't eat his chicken, he wouldn't get a treat. IMMEDIATELY after finishing his chicken, he announced "I ate all my dinner! Now I get a treat!" I got the ice cream out of the freezer and he said "Yay! Ice cream! Now THAT'S what I'm talkin' about!"

The Manimal loves to play upstairs in his room, and was doing so. We could hear him singing to himself and talking to the trains. This went on for some time, until the doorbell rang. There he stood, clad only in his undershorts and a grin. He'd apparently slipped out the garage door and taken a bike ride up the street. I'm considering installing an invisible fence...


Lest you think The Manimal is the only entertaining one of my two...

Sweet Son #1, after being the main entree on the mosquitos' evening buffet, came in and pitifully asked "Can't we move to a place where there aren't any bugs?"

Logic is clearly not a strong suit among the nearly-nine set. When we were gathering items for our garage sale last weekend, he decided he would pack up and sell some of his beloved Legos.Which was all well and good until he announced he would use the money from the sale of said Legos to, you guessed it, buy more Legos.

A budding man of the world, while getting his hair cut on Sunday, I heard the hairstylist ask SS#1 if he would be practicing any schoolwork this summer (seriously, what kind of question is that?!). I quietly thanked my lucky stars that he didn't just snort in laughter, and then he responded "No, I don't think I'll have enough time, because I'll be travelling a lot this summer."He'll be with the Diva Grandparents and Diva Godparents for most of July, then will indeed take a little car trip down to Tennessee at the end of the month. But "traveling a lot"? I guess it's all in your perspective.

I Dreamed a Dream

Did you ever have a dream? I don't mean one of those where you're being chased by dinosaurs or where you get to work and everyone is speaking some sort of weird, unintelligible foreign language because they've been taken over by aliens.

I mean a real dream. Like writing the Great American Novel, becoming an opera singer or winning the Boston Marathon? Like having a wonderful home full of children, pets and a spouse you love? Like traveling to a foreign country just because?

There's certainly no shortage print material available that can help you "live your dream". There are a thousand and one "motivational speakers" that can inspire with their words. You can train for years, pray hard, and work hard. All too often, though, we fall short of the dream for one reason or another.

Very often, we prejudge (or ARE prejudged) based on appearance. Society has its accepted norms for how we should look, especially if we are going to be in the public eye, such as the entertainment industry. Sometimes, talent gets overlooked or doesn't even have a chance, if the person doesn't "fit".

While we all "know" this is wrong, it is, unfortunately, a fact of life.

Usually.

Enter Susan Boyle, a 47 year old, never-been-kissed, unemployed Briton. Prejudging her based on appearance, she's certainly not the person you'd figure would sing well. But she had a dream. She'd had some vocal training and wanted to be as famous Elaine Page, often deemed the "First Lady" of British musical theatre.


Then put her in front of three of Britain's most well-know talent scouts, including the ever-cynical, yet incredibly successful Simon Cowell.


A recipe for humiliation on national television. A disaster waiting to happen.

Watch and learn (can't embed the video, sorry).

She dreamed a dream.

And the tigers? Blown away.

Good Day!

I can remember visiting my Wisconsin grandparents when I was a child. For lunch, we would usually have leftovers from dinner the night before, accompanied by homemade pickles and some of the famous Wisconsin cheese (California cows ain't got nothing on those fabulous Wisconsin dairy-makers!).

During lunch, my grandma would turn on the radio, which would run the local agricultural report, the weather, and Paul Harvey.

Paul Harvey died yesterday at the ripe old age of 90.

His trademark phrases of "Stand by for news!" and "Now you know the rest of the story" punctuate my memory of those lunches with my grandparents. I don't have too many memories of listening to the radio at home, except for when my dad would listen to ball games out in the garage in the summer, but Paul Harvey will be forever associated with lunches at my grandparents' home.

My Papa died in 1990 and my Grandma, still very much alive, lives in a senior apartment complex. Paul Harvey's voice in their kitchen has been silenced for many years, but will always be alive in the ears of America.

Good Day, indeed.

A Love Story

***EDITED: I posted this earlier and decided I wanted to learn a bit more about Kurt Warner. Apparently this version of Kurt and Brenda Warner's meeting isn't exactly how things happened. So while it's a sweet story, I thought I'd post the real thing as well!

When they met, Kurt was a university student and Brenda was a divorced single mom living on food stamps. In his autobiography "Keep Your Head Up," Kurt describes his and Brenda's first encounter when a teammate at the University of Northern Iowa talked him into going to a country-music club in Cedar Falls, Iowa. There was an instant connection, but Brenda didn't know whether it would last. Not only was she a single mom, but one of her two children, her son Zachary, had significant medical problems. He was blinded and brain-injured when accidentally dropped to the floor by her first husband. Kurt was not turned aside by the children or Zachary's condition and he and Brenda forged a relationship that resulted in their marrying four years later. Kurt's celebrated job at a grocery store took place in 1994 after he got a pink-slip from the Green Bay Packers. He returned to Cedar Falls and worked nights stocking shelves for $5.50 an hour. He rose to fame by throwing an amazing 41 touchdowns for the Rams, bringing them to a 13-3 record and to memorable victory in Super Bowl XXXIV. He's become known for his commitment to his family, his clean-kid lifestyle, and his Christian faith. He and Brenda now live in St. Louis with their four children Zachary, Kade, Jesse, and Jada Jo. He is the founder of the First Things First Foundation.

I'm not a huge football fan. The Diva Husband doesn't watch any sports, with rare exception. So we're not really taking sides in this whole Super Bowl thingy. If asked, I say I'm cheering for Pittsburgh, out of loyalty to my fellow Miamian, Big Ben.

But then my IRL friend and fellow blogger, The Music Man, had to go and share this story about Kurtis and Brenda. Now my loyalties are divided!

In a supermarket, Kurtis the stock boy, was busily working when a new voice came over the asking for a carry out at check register 4. Kurtis was almost finished, and wanted to get some fresh air, and decided to answer the call. As he approached the check-out stand, a distant smile caught his eye, the new check out girl was beautiful.

She was an older woman (maybe 26, and he was only 22) and he fell in love. Later that day, after his shift was over, he waited by the punch clock to find out her name. She came into the break room, smiled softly at him, took her card and punched out, then left. He looked at her card, BRENDA. He walked out only to see her start walking up the road.

Next day, he waited outside as she left the supermarket, and offered her a ride home. He looked harmless enough, and she accepted. When he dropped her off, he asked if maybe he could see her again,outside of work. She simply said it wasn't possible. He pressed and she explained she had two children and she couldn't afford a baby-sitter, so he offered to pay for the baby-sitter. Reluctantly she accepted his offer for a date for the following Saturday.

That Saturday night he arrived at her door only to have her tell him that she was unable to go with him. The baby-sitter had called and canceled. To which Kurtis simply said, "Well, let's take the kidswith us." She tried to explain that taking the children was not an option, but again not taking no for an answer, he pressed. Finally Brenda, brought him inside to meet her children.

She had an older daughter who was just cute as a bug, Kurtis thought, then Brenda brought out her son, in a wheelchair, he was born a paraplegic with Down Syndrome. Kurtis said to Brenda, "I still don't understand why the kids can't come with us?" Brenda was amazed. Most men would run away from a woman with two kids, especially if one had disabilities. Just like her first husband and father of her children did.

That evening Kurtis and Brenda loaded up the kids, went to dinner and the movies. When her son needed anything Kurtis would take care of him. When he needed to use the rest room, he picked him up out of his chair, took him, brought him back. The kids loved Kurtis. At the end of the evening, Brenda knew this was the man she was going to marry and spend the rest of her life with.

A year later, they were married and Kurtis adopted both of her children and since then they have added two more kids. So what happened to the stock boy and check out girl?

Mr. & Mrs. Kurt Warner now live in Phoenix, Arizona, where he plays Quarterback for the Arizona Cardinals.