Music Monday

In the spirit of "get off my butt and blog already", I've decided to start trying some "regular" posts. From this day forward, Mondays will be "Music Mondays". I find this incredibly appropriate on two levels.

One, I am a musician. I was a band geek in high school, as well as a music major in college and for five years was a high school band and choir director. Even though I've not been a band director longer than I actually WAS a band director, I'll always be a band kid at heart.

Two, I spent the better part of Friday night procrastinating. I was SUPPOSED to be finalizing some details for two events on Saturday, but nooooooo. I was on that timesucking vortex Facebook watching old high school band videos!

Since technical difficulties don't allow me to actually post one of those videos, and in a tribute to our upcoming Homecoming Celebration, I'll show you a video of my sophomore year in college as a proud member of the Miami University Marching Band.

MU-Go Band!
MU-Go Band!
MU-Go Band!
Miami!

Fragmentation

I took today off work. Which is probably a good thing since I have to work an event tomorrow from 7 am-1 pm and then will be headed to our Haiti Banquet (Which doesn't begin until 6, but like most events, I can't just GO and be a guest. I have to get myself involved in the PLANNING. I'm crazy that way.), so say a prayer that the MORE THAN 200 GUESTS will have a great time and loads of money will be raised for our Haitian brothers and sisters!

Diva Husband, the only one of our little family of four who chose not to receive the flu vaccine, has the flu. I'm not, however, going to rub it in his face, out of sheer terror that the strain against which I was vaccinated is not the strain which he has contracted.

I'm leaving in four days for a conference in Grand Rapids, MI. My sheer joy at being off work for three days is only topped by the fact that I'm then driving home to the Buckeye State BY MYSELF to go to Homecoming at the best university in the world. Did I mention that I'll be in Ohio for three days BY MYSELF. As in SANS CHILDREN AND HUSBAND? And I'll get to go to Oxford and eat toasted rolls and greasy pizza? Diva Nana (and maybe Diva Papa) will be traveling down with me to share in the joy that is a quintessential college town in the fall.

But my children and husband?

NOT!

I've decided to put out an all points bulletin for early Autumn. Clearly she's been snatched away and we've gone right past October and into late November weather.

Our dining room ceiling is leaking. More accurately, I suppose, it's actually our master bathroom floor. Either way, it's not good. And it's wet.

SS#1 is having his school pictures taken on Wednesday. I leave REALLY EARLY Wednesday morning. No way in Hades am I leaving the outfit up to him. We'll be having a practice dressing session.

Did I mention that I'm going to be away from home BY MYSELF for six whole days? Of course, I'll probably miss the boys (big and little) and have to talk to them every night. I'll probably end up sleeping on the edge of the bed, just because that's where I usually end up.

Maybe the hotel will hire a couple of local school kids to bang on my door to wake me up in the morning?

Skin and Bones

A few days ago I wrote about my journey on the low road.

Well, clearly I wasn't the only one on that road. The clearly airbrushed model in the picture, Filippa Hamilton, is actually a 5'10", 120 pound supermodel.

Whose contract with Ralph Lauren was terminated last April. According to Hamilton, Lauren terminated her because she was "too large".

Uhm...

Uhm...

I'm really trying not to use the words that are flying through my head right now. My dad wouldn't approve.

I'm 5'10" tall. According to Weight Watchers, the "healthy" weight range for that height is between 139 and 174 pounds. A normal BMI, according to the National Institutes of Health is 18.5-24.9. A 5'10" woman weighing 120 has a BMI of 17.2, which not only puts her OUT of the "normal" range, but plops her clearly in the "underweight" range.

Now, I'm not a big one for relying on numbers and charts, and frankly, "normal" is just a setting on a washing machine. But if Ralph Lauren feels that Filippa Hamilton is "large" with her 5'10", 120 pound frame, why does he even BOTHER with his Lauren Woman line of clothing for sizes 14-22? I'm sure he'd much rather be designing for those models in the size 0-2 range.

Better yet, why bother with girls like Filippa Hamilton at all. I mean, they could save loads of money and airbrush time if they went with a whole cadre of the perfect supermodels...

Fragmentation

It's that time again folks! I've come to love Fragmented Fridays in the last week because lately, that's how my brain's been working!

"Honey, wake up! You've won the Nobel Peace Prize!" Yes, apparently those nutty Norwegians have decided to award the Nobel Peace Prize based on President Obama's intentions for the future.

I distinctly remember a certain road to a certain not-so-nice-place being paved with...oh, nevermind.

In other, less worldly news, my new dishwasher arrived! AmenandthankyouJesus! It's beautiful. And quiet. And I don't have to do thirty-eleven loads of dishes every.blessed.day. And did I mention how QUIET it is? And the controls are concealed, which means that The Manimal won't find them for, oh, at least twenty-nine minutes.

And it's quiet. Meet Bosch, the Boss of Dishwashing...



The dentist said that The Manimal has "early childhood caries", which apparently do not result from simply not brushing well. Dr. Teeth said that there's been a huge resurgence, the like of which has not been seen since the 1960's. It's due to a lot of factors, one of which is the prevalence of high fructose corn syrup in foods.

Now, I'm not a Green Queen, like my friend H, but I do try not to buy overly processed foods. Dr. Teeth informed me, though, that HFCS is even in things like GOLDFISH CRACKERS! Uhm, well we're in trouble then, because The Manimal? He luurrrrvvvves goldfish crackers. More than life itself, I sometimes think. And then Dr. Teeth tells me that HFCS is like putting BATTERY ACID on teeth.

And the Corn Refiners Association remind us that HFCS is made from corn, which is natural and healthy.

I respectfully remind the Corn Refiners that ethanol is also made from corn and maybe they'd like me to substitute ethanol for my kids' morning OJ.

High fructose corn syrup is the Devil's Elixir.

It's October 9th. We're expecting our first frost tonight and first hard freeze tomorrow night. I feel it necessary to remind you at this moment that I live outside of Chicago, Illinois, not Fargo, North Dakota.

And the Halloween costumes we bought last week are really not big enough to accommodate a snowsuit underneath the costume.

Sweet Son #1 has earned A's on his last five spelling tests, sort of akin to the Chicago Cubs winning the World Series (which might explain the freezing weather). This is kind of a big deal for him and we're incredibly proud. :)

The Manimal has found yet another way to torture Princess the Wonder Dog. Sooner or later she's going to bite him.

She just has to figure out an escape method for the moment immediately following the bite.

You take the high road and I'll take the low road...

I really try not to swear. Aside from my faith-related viewpoint, I always hear my dad's voice in my head saying that people who swear are showing their ignorance, because they can't think of appropriate words to describe their feelings.

Sorry, Dad, but there are no words in the entire English language to adequately convey my feelings for what I'm about to share with my bloggy friends.

Today I saw this photo on Robin's blog, Pensieve.



Uhm...

Uhhh...

What the F*CK?!

Now, I know all about the photoshopping insanity that goes on in the editing departments for the sole purpose of driving women insane trying to look like a supermodel eliminating any shred of positive self-esteem that young female humans have left selling the products, but honestly? Do they REALLY think that this ad will sell jeans to any human being?

I'm not even going to address the fact that I can't imagine buying jeans that look like THAT when they're new. But good grief. Someone needs to either feed that poor girl or fire the photoshopping idiot who thought that putting the waist/hips of a six year-old on an adult woman was a good idea.

If this is high fashion, then Ohmygranny, am I glad to live in the lowlands.

Fragmentation

I discovered this Friday Fragments thingy today over on Georgie's blog. I like it. My brain is pretty fragmented right now, so it's perfect. Here goes.

Oh, speaking of Georgie, have you bloggers all signed up for the Secret Santa Soiree? It's loads of fun and you should sign up. Go now, I'll wait.

Everyone back? Okey-dokey then, onto the next bit of fragmentedwisdom insanity.

I didn't "Back the Bid" and apparently, neither did the IOC voters. Chicago 2016 ain't gonna happen. Although I was less than thrilled about the prospect of the Olympics in Chicago, I was strangely bummed when the Windy City was bumped in the first round.

Uhm...October?! Wheretheheck did you come from?! I'm pretty sure last time I checked it was June.

It's cold here. Don't get me wrong. I absolutely LOVE fall; it's my favorite season. But this? This is late November weather. Mother Nature, we are not amused.

I love three-paycheck months. They're a sort of freak of the Gregorian Calendar. You go merrily on your way with a paycheck twice a month, then suddenly that fifth Friday sneaks in there. Woo-Hoo!

We're going to check out Halloween costumes for the little monsters this weekend.
SS#1 wants to be whatever 9 y/o boys are into these days some sort of Ninja Warrior/Transformer/X-Men character. The Manimal wants to be a bad policeman lion fireman with a pink jacket.

Moving on.

Am I crazy for planning SS#1's potential summer activities in October?

That was a rhetorical question.

In the spirit of Halloween costumes, I'll leave you with this visual fragment. It's a blurry version of the monsters, aka "Captain Underpants and Sock Fighter Boy".

And just for the record, those underwear and socks were clean when they started this little fantasy game.

**Postscript Fragment--Whattheheck is up with Blogger! UGH!